Beautiful; I Always Wanted to Be By Felina Silver Copyright© 2019, 2025

I never craved applause or shining light,
But oh, to be seen — to linger in someone’s sight.
Not for praise, but for presence —
To know I existed in a heart, a mind, a sentence.

Mirrors became battlegrounds,
Each glance a war I never won.
I’d turn away with furrowed brow,
Ashamed of the girl I had become.

But just days past, I snapped a photo —
A simple selfie, sent with care.
And paused — just paused — to look again,
To meet the gaze that lingered there.

“Boy, you’re actually kind of pretty,”
Slipped from lips that had only ever sneered.
A whisper of grace, so unfamiliar —
The first kind word I’d ever volunteered.

For years, I called myself ugly —
Each picture proof, each frame a flaw.
But something softened in that moment,
Some truth broke past the silent wall.

Then yesterday, beneath my mother’s eyes,
She paused — her gaze a still, warm sea.
I asked, “Is something wrong?” She smiled and said,
“No, I was just seeing how beautiful you are to me.”

I held my chest to catch the tears
That bloomed inside but would not fall.
“Aw, thank you — you’re so sweet,” I said,
And her laughter was the gentlest call.

We shared a silence full of smiles,
More healing than a thousand songs.
And later, in the car, I whispered,
“She told me I was pretty — for the first time, all along.”